Dell tech "support"

I'm so goddamn irritated with Dell right now, that I can barely stand to explain it any further. I'm pasting in notes below on my FOUR interactions with Dell tech "support" today: three on the phone, one online. The best thing that can be said is that the online chat support guy didn't hang up on me, transfer me inappropriately, or fail to call me back as "Jennifer" (the first phone person) promised to.

All in all, this began Friday 10/14/2005, starting ~1:30pm MDT, and completing ~6:30pm MDT

Call #1: At least "Jennifer" had me run the (worthless) Dell diagnostic
tools. But then since the hard drive scan function was taking so long, she
insisted that she had to call me back, in "precisely" thirty minutes. Of
course, she failed to, despite having my cell phone and home phone
numbers.

Call #2: Random male was completely mystified by the problem, and without
telling me or asking me, transferred me to the pay-for-support number.

Call #3: Random woman was of even less help than before, and seemed
boggled by the idea that I did not possess an original Windows XP cd. I explained,
patiently, that new computers haven't (to my experience) shipped with
Windows XP CDs in years, only "recovery" CDs. I also explained to her that
when I'm using wireless, the wireless indicator light occasionally goes
off, even though the connection keeps working. She told me, vaguely, that
we'd fix that too. Ha, ha.
She mostly ran through the Power Options control panel, and had me do the
same things I did a month and a half ago when I spoke with a phone tech
service person. She hung up on me shortly after.

Next: online "chat" with technical support. "Abhishek_Punj" had me do the
same things in the Power Options, mostly, and ultimately told me:

{Abhishek_Punj 7:22:40 PM} Not to worry.If the issue is not resolved
then I will give you a system exchange if you want.

HA, HA! I somehow doubt that Abhishek_Punj is, himself, authorized to give me a system exchange, but I sure do look forward to THAT conversation.

Just in case you don't want to read through the entire snoozefest, I have bolded my favorite parts. I also suggest the latter parts, after about 7:04pm, as the best reading.

Welcome to Dell Chat. Please wait for an available agent. You will be notified when your chat is accepted by an agent.
The session has been accepted.

{Abhishek_Punj 6:43:26 PM} Thank you for contacting Dell Consumer Hardware Warranty Support for Portables. My name is Abhishek. Please allow me a couple of minutes to pull up your system and the warranty details.
{ 6:43:48 PM} Sure.
{Abhishek_Punj 6:44:12 PM} I request you to please elaborate on the issue.
FOOTNOTE: I had typed in, in detail, the issue when I requested the chat session.

{ 6:44:48 PM} When the laptop goes to Stand By mode, it sometimes fails to work, and the hard drive keep spinning, and the fan keeps spinning, and it gets extremely hot.
{ 6:45:08 PM} When I try to open the lid to restart, it fails to restart, and has to be hard-shutdown (by holding the power key for 7-10 seconds).
{Abhishek_Punj 6:45:10 PM} Please give me a minute to review your question and in the mean time can you please verify the system shipping address and the telephone number.
{ 6:45:27 PM} [**** Blanketyblank Ave, Sometown, CA 99999
1-999-555-5555
{Abhishek_Punj 6:45:47 PM} Thank you for the information.Please stay online.
{ 6:45:52 PM} Okay.
{Abhishek_Punj 6:46:05 PM} If I understand the issue correctly your system is getting hot.
{ 6:46:11 PM} No.
{ 6:46:18 PM} The problem is that the Stand By doesn't work correctly.
{ 6:46:24 PM} And so it gets hot.
{ 6:46:30 PM} And doesn't restart correctly.
{ 6:46:39 PM} But the problem is that the Stand By mode doesn't work correctly.
{Abhishek_Punj 6:46:54 PM} May I provide you a website link through which with the help of some simple steps this issue can be resolved?
{ 6:47:03 PM} Absolutely not. Out of the question.
{ 6:47:07 PM} I have tried, and it's worthless.
{ 6:47:11 PM} No Help whatsoever.
{Abhishek_Punj 6:47:24 PM} Okay.
{Abhishek_Punj 6:48:24 PM} Please allow me a couple of minutes so that I will be able to provide you with the best resolution.
{ 6:48:29 PM} Fine.
{Abhishek_Punj 6:49:54 PM} Please click on start icon---click on control panel------click on power options.
{ 6:50:24 PM} I am there. Want me to click on the Hibernate tab?
{Abhishek_Punj 6:50:39 PM} Yes.
{ 6:50:45 PM} What next?
{Abhishek_Punj 6:50:50 PM} Click the Start button.
Click Control Panel.
Click Performance and Maintenance.
Click Power Options.
Click the Hibernate tab.
Click to select the Enable hibernate support check box.
Click the Apply button.
Click the Power Schemes tab.
Click the drop down arrow next to System hibernates and select the amount of time to wait before the system hibernates.
Click the Apply button.
Click the OK button.
{ 6:51:54 PM} Did all that. You do realize the problem is with Stand By, and not Hibernate, right?
{ 6:52:11 PM} By the way, Hibernate has ALWAYS been enabled on my computer, since the day I got it.
{Abhishek_Punj 6:52:46 PM} Daniel, hibernate and stand by is the same thing.
{ 6:53:13 PM} Okay, if you say so. Suspect that Microsoft would create two different functions to do the same thing, but okay. What next?
{Abhishek_Punj 6:56:10 PM} Under the Power Schemes tab, change the setting for Turn off hard disks to Never by clicking on the .
Click on OK .
{ 6:57:09 PM} Okay -- for "Plugged In", "Running on Batteries", or both?
{Abhishek_Punj 6:57:29 PM} Both.
{ 6:57:35 PM} Okay.
What next?
{Abhishek_Punj 6:58:03 PM} Please restart the system to resolve the issue.
{ 6:58:40 PM} Okay. I'll restart.
{Abhishek_Punj 6:58:59 PM} Please let me know, are you chatting with the same system?
{ 6:59:09 PM} No. I am on another computer.
{Abhishek_Punj 6:59:16 PM} Okay.
{ 7:01:37 PM} Okay, it's restarted. What now?
{Abhishek_Punj 7:02:02 PM} Please confirm if the issue is resolved or not?
{ 7:03:00 PM} No, it isn't resolved.
{Abhishek_Punj 7:03:08 PM} Okay,
{Abhishek_Punj 7:04:44 PM} [dangr], we need to perform the repair utility to resolve this issue.Is this comfortable with you?
{ 7:05:26 PM} Not if it's the same stuff I already did earlier with the phone representatives. What, specifically, is it?
{Abhishek_Punj 7:06:36 PM} Daniel, this utility is specially designed to tackle with the loopholes in the operating system and to handle with the errors and drivers conflicts.
{ 7:07:07 PM} Fine. How do I get to it?
{Abhishek_Punj 7:07:26 PM} May I provide you a website link through which with the help of some simple steps repair utility can be performed?
{ 7:08:08 PM} NO. ABSOULTELY NOT. You asked me this before, and I said no. The same answer applies now. Help me if you can, or tell me who I talk to next if you cannot help me.
{Abhishek_Punj 7:10:36 PM} Perform the Repair Reinstall
1.Reboot your computer with the Windows XP CD in the CD drive.
2.The following message will appear on a black screen with white letters:
Press any key to boot from the CD.
3.Press the to boot to the Windows XP CD.
4.After several moments of initializing some modules, the Windows XP Setup screen will appear.
5.Press the key.
6.The Windows XP Licensing Agreement appears.
7.Read the license agreement.
8.Press the key to agree.
9.Setup will search for previous versions of Windows.
10.Press the key to repair.
11.Click the Next button.
12.Setup will continue to install files.
13.After several minutes the Welcome to Microsoft Windows window appears.
14.Click the Next button.
15.Click the Next button.
{ 7:10:59 PM} Fine. Please hold while I do these things.
{ 7:11:06 PM} NO!
{Abhishek_Punj 7:11:08 PM} [dangr], I have typed the steps for your satisfaction.
{ 7:11:15 PM} Actually, I don't have a Windows XP CD.
{ 7:11:28 PM} It has been years since WIndows XP CDs shipped with computers, and this is no exception.
{ 7:11:35 PM} I did not receive a Windows XP CD.
{Abhishek_Punj 7:11:45 PM} Not to worry.I will send you the cd to resolve the issue.Is this comfortable with you?
{ 7:12:43 PM} Okay. To be honest, no, I'm not happy with this or comfortable with this approach, but I seem to have little choice, since it appears to be a mystery to Dell tech support that XP CDs don't ship with Dell computers.
So, yes, send me the CD.
{ 7:13:03 PM} Want my address?
{Abhishek_Punj 7:13:08 PM} Please provide me the following details,
1) Complete address (with zip code)
2) Land line telephone number
3) Cell phone number if the landline phone number is not available
{ 7:14:19 PM} [dangr]
12345 Somestreet
Apt. #**
Salt Lake City, UT 841**

landline phone: 999-555-5555
cell phone: 999-555-5555

{Abhishek_Punj 7:15:44 PM} Thank you for the information.Please allow me some time so that I will give you the dispatch number.
{ 7:16:01 PM} I'll wait.
{Abhishek_Punj 7:16:44 PM} Thank you for being online.
{ 7:17:13 PM} It was not a pleasure.
Is that all?
{Abhishek_Punj 7:17:07 PM} The dispatch number is 063****** and you will get the cd with in 48 hours.
{Abhishek_Punj 7:17:51 PM} Is there anything else I may assist you with today?
{ 7:18:22 PM} Not unless you can actually help with my problem, short of me having that CD. Can you?
{Abhishek_Punj 7:20:01 PM} If you want then i can call you back after when you received the cd to confirm that if the issue is resolved or not.
{ 7:20:37 PM} Ummmm, yeah. Sure. Go ahead. I'll be absolutely shocked if this solves the problem, but sure, call me back. I look forward to it.
{Abhishek_Punj 7:20:57 PM} Please provide me your contact number.
{ 7:21:44 PM} Did you not get it when I provided it seven minutes ago?
Here it is again:
landline phone: 999-555-5555
cell phone: 999-555-5555
{Abhishek_Punj 7:21:55 PM} Thank you for the information.
{ 7:22:12 PM} I'm tickled to provide it. Call the cell phone number first, okay?
{Abhishek_Punj 7:22:40 PM} Not to worry.If the issue is not resolved then I will give you a system exchange if you want.
{ 7:22:59 PM} That would be lovely. Thanks. I look forward to your phone call.
{Abhishek_Punj 7:23:29 PM} Thank you,Daniel.It was a pleasure chatting with you.
{Abhishek_Punj 7:23:32 PM} Thank you for visiting Dell Technical
Support online chat and allowing me the opportunity to assist you. I have
included your case number to reference our interaction today. Please keep
this on file; it will assist you when contacting Dell Inc in the future.
Also, feel free to visit us again at
http://support.dell.com/support/topics/blahblahblahblahblahblahblah.html
{ 7:23:44 PM} The pleasure was all mine.
{ 7:23:49 PM} Really.
{Abhishek_Punj 7:24:13 PM} Yes, you are our privileged customer.
{ 7:24:32 PM} I'm ecstatic to hear that. Here, I thought I was just one of millions.
{Abhishek_Punj 7:26:06 PM} Thank you ,[dangr].
{ 7:26:26 PM} No, no: thank you, Abhishek_Punj.

At that point, I asked him if he'd noted in my case reference file that he'd offered to replace my computer if this didn't work, but, surprise surprise, he disconnected as I was sending it.

Liver, don't fail me now!

Last night we went through, in a little over two hours, two six packs between two of us. That included one quarter of one movie, following me shutting her out in Trivial Pursuit, six to no. In her defense, the questions were slightly, vaguely, a tiny bit difficult.

Earlier in the evening, we had the fantastic IPA Junior at Red Rock, only to be shattered in our brilliant designs of a growler: it's on nitro, and they won't do it in a growler. Fuckers.

I spent much of the weekend looking at houses (the outsides) and today sent a list of seven to our realtor that I'd like to see the insides of. Mostly east side: the things on the west wide in our price range are either too damn far west or north, or varying degrees of yucky.

The babbling, prattling, and generally rude noise and cell phone usage in the SLC main public library continues to amaze me: people seem to think it's a fucking bar, except with no alcohol, and lots of books randomly strewn around.

Never too busy for consumer protection

The movers showed up today (with only two days advance request from me!) with all of our stuff, so our main front room currently looks like a storage unit. Thus, I don't have a heck of a lot of time to blog. BUT: I'm NEVER too busy to blog consumer protection. Here is the first non-response (excepting automated replies) from Albertson's:

Dear [dangr],

Thank you for contacting Albertsons Customer Care. We received your email regarding the produce at our 200 South store in Salt Lake City.

Please accept our apology. We want all of our customers to have a good experience when shopping with our company. We take our customers’ complaints seriously and have forwarded your complaint to the Store Director. For your records, your case number is 1*****.

Keeping you as a customer is important to us. You will be contacted with feedback regarding your case within 24 hours.

Again, thank you for contacting Albertsons Customer Care. If we can provide any information or be of service to you in the future, please do not hesitate to contact us by e-mail or by calling 1-877-***-****.

Sincerely,

Allison M.
Albertsons Customer Care Representative

What a thunderous silence this represents. Let's see what the next 24 hours yields.

Surprise, surprise: the shitty produce goes to the poorer neighborhoods

Here is the text of the message I just sent to Albertsons:

Frankly, I'm really pretty disgusted with Albertsons right now. On Saturday night, 9/3/05, around 7pm, I bought a lot of groceries from my local Albertsons, including a lot of produce.

This included two heads of fresh garlic, for a total of $1.00 + tax. The next night, 9/4/05, preparing dinner, I started peeling the garlic for a pasta sauce. When I came across one clove beginning to go bad, with extensive brown spots, I didn't think much of it, and threw it away. Then the next one also had lots of deep brown spots. Then the next one was actively rotting. Then another with brown spots. In the end, at least half of both heads were actively rotten, or getting very close to it. I stopped peeling, cooked the sauce without the garlic, and put it all in a ziploc bag.

When I took it in within an hour to Albertsons, I asked to speak with a manager. I didn't just want a $1.00 refund; I wanted to talk to someone who would actually look at this disgusting garlic. At 7:30pm, I was told no manager was in the store for the rest of the night. This for a store open until midnight? Operating for four and a half hours with no manager or managerial personnel?

I was instead approached by the produce clerk, a young man who was pleasant, and apologized, but seemed mystified that I wanted to talk to someone about it, and why a simple refund wasn't sufficient. He told me that "sometimes this just happens" and that while that garlic should have been thrown away when it was being stocked, it sometimes just gets through. In short, he basically dismissed my concerns, and blew me off.

My concerns, which I tried to explain to him (notably, in a calmer tone than this e-mail contains), were this: this produce wasn't just bad, it was TOTALLY UNACCEPTABLE. It wasn't just a fluke: I've had bad produce on numerous other occasions from THIS Albertsons. In the past, I've just tossed it out, and written it off to "these things happen", as the young produce clerk blandly posited. I have now realized that it's a regular theme at this location:

And this is what is most irritating: the produce at this store is CONSISTENTLY worse than any other Albertsons in Salt Lake City that I have been to: older, less fresh, often bordering on rotten. It is also worse than Smith's supermarkets, the local competition. As I said to the cashier who gave me the refund, "Show me garlic like this in Sugarhouse". (Sugarhouse is a more affluent neighborhood, a few miles south from my downtown Salt Lake City neighborhood.) The cashier was very polite, and without obviously agreeing, silently ceded the point through body language.

So, I write to ask you several things:

1) Is there neighborhood profiling going on about where the old/nasty produce is sent, and/or how long it's kept on the shelf for sale? That is, do you send the bad stuff to the downtown store? Or the best stuff to the Sugarhouse (or other more affluent) stores?

2) Is it imaginable to you that no manager or managerial personnel would be present anywhere in the store from 7:30pm to closing (midnight)?

3) Do you find acceptable the explanation that "sometimes this just happens"?

I look forward to your response. E-mail is fine, as is paper mail.

Sincerely,
[signed, dangr]
Downtown Salt Lake City, Utah

Ding, dong:

... the fucker is dead, the fucker is dead, ding, dong, the rotten fucker is dead! The news, on one hand, is a cause for celebration: he was a really rotten son of a bitch, who probably did more to fuck up the federal judiciary than any other single person in history, though Shrubfucker is giving him a run for his money. From his being one of two dissenters in Roe v. Wade, right up to his engineering the annointing of King Shrubfucker, Rehnny has been fundamentally harmed our country, and the world, perhaps beyond all recovery. Oh course, the last several years of the intentionally styled Anti-Warren Court have been surprisingly unhorrifying, but only in comparison to the nonsense that issued from the high bench for decades under the asshole. I guess after Shrubfucker v. Gore, they had to scale back their long insincere "states rights" jurisprudence.

I can only hope that he died in pain, and that, since he ostensibly believes in hell, he is now there. With any luck, his appointed torturers in hell will be card-carrying ACLU members, black hooded anarchists from Eugene, women who actually want to retain some say over what happens to their bodies, and other people who love civil rights and individual liberties.

On the other hand, the result of this has been a rather frightening acceleration in Shrubfucker's continuing campaign to remake the third branch, long a stalwart of sanity in our government, in the image of a Rapture staging area. His nomination of Johnny Boy, a former Rehnny law clerk, to take up the big reins, was no surprise to me, but definitely ups the stakes. We'll have to see if the Demopublicans bend over and lick the boots of big money and power once again on the now even more problematic nomination of this lockstep partywhore demagogue.

And what will we get next? Will Shrubfucker engage in some insincere, manipulative, condescending racial pandering (ala "¡Viva Bush!", or the making of Condipo his Secretary of State) and nominate Alberto Gonzales or Emilio Garcia? Or maybe some equally disinginuous gender pandering (uhhh, Condipoo?), and nominate one of the Two Ediths: Edith Jones, or Edith Clement? Or will he murder two birds with one stone and go with Janice Brown? And on the topic, how many more stealth nominees does he have lurking beneath rocks? Stay tuned: this should get really, really ugly.

Katrina comes home

J was deployed yesterday to New Orleans to work on establishing a public health command center. Details are sketchy, but I talked to her this morning, and she was doing okay. They expected a long drive from Atlanta to New Orelans due to the need to avoid I-10. They expect to be camping at a naval air station, so they should be plenty safe.

I don't want to post many details here, since while I know very little, I don't now how much of it is public information.

Meanwhile, here in Utah, 600 (or more?) Internally Displaced Persons have been housed at Camp Williams, in Bluffdale, about 40 miles south of Salt Lake City. (see the definition for IDPs: they are probably not considered refugees, which requires that they have crossed an international border. Wikipedia goes on to clarify that "Environmental refugees (people displaced because of environmental problems such as drought) are not included in the definition of "refugee" under international law.") Finding clear information on volunteer opportunities is difficult; while I appreciate cash is more valuable than anything else right now, I, as usual, have more time than cash.

Confidential to TGS :

What's up with all the self-indulgent whining and moaning? Get your ass our here for some BEER.

My response to the Dell Service customer satisfaction survey

I recently had to talk to Dell's incompetent service techs on the phone, as my new Dell 700M laptop has an anoying problem: occasionally, and without an easily reproducable set of circumstances, when I cause it to Stand By by closing the lid of the machine, the hard drive keeps spinning. This is really bad, since the fan keeps blowing, and the machine gets REALLY hot while sitting in a stuffy little laptop bag, or other bag. Dell's primary advice? Don't use 'Stand By': it's a bad feature. Oh, and they don't like Hibernate either. He told me that if I'm going to not be using the computer for more than 40 minutes, I should ALWAYS shut it all the way down. Huh??? What the hell are the Hibernate and Stand By features for, then?

And yes, for the curious: the problem HAS occurred when I've had it on Stand By for less than 40 minutes.

Since they send out e-surveys which invite narrative comments on what they can do better, I wrote this:

Having technicians who know only how to follow problem solving algorithms, but lack in-depth knowledge of the systems they purport to provide service for, does Dell a great disservice.

Further, having technicians who tell me that the "Stand By" and "Hibernate" functions included in EVERY modern Windows based computer are dangerous and should be avoided is ridiculous. It is utter nonsense that "Stand By" should never be used longer than 40 minutes, as the Dell technician told me.

We'll see if they bother to respond.

Zion National Park

Was lovely... except for the obnoxious, stupid, loud, boorish tourists. Most of these were so obnoxious because they couldn't understand that not everyone within a half mile wanted to hear their stupid, stupid conversations. The campground (Watchman Tent site) was pretty great, though, in terms of people being respectfully quiet, that is, after the pickup soccer game being shreikingly played on the road outside the bathrooms.

Confidential to the approximately 75 camera toting Japanese tourists in the large group at the Museum of Man on Sunday morning: what the fuck had you done by 10 o'clock in the morning in your loafers and chinos that it seemed necessary to get into a massage train?

I will say, however, that people badmouthing Springdale, Utah, the town just outside the park's boundaries, seem pretty misguided. We were there on a weekend at the end of high season, and the place was pleasant, easy, and nearly deserted. And The Mean Bean coffeehouse kicked serious ass: friendly, pleasant, politically solid, fun people selling great coffee, and great sandwiches.

We enjoyed our hiking at Zion, limited though it was, and were lucky enough to stumble into doing it at the best possible times: late afternoon (after the loudmouths have gone to their RVs and hotel rooms), and early morning (before the loudmouths have awoken.)

Cedar Breaks National Monument, just an hour away by car, is a world away from Zion in culture and pleasantness. The hiking trails were quiet, nearly deserted (though this could have been partially due to the hailstorm that I hiked through the beginnings of, and the fact that I visited on a weekday.) The views and photography opportunities were fantastic, and the loudmouths seem to stay away.

Current value received from the $50 National Parks Pass in the less than one month we've owned it: $34 ($20: Zion NP; $4 Cedar Breaks NM; $10 Arches NP).

Selling your whole life on ebay

This is suspiciously similar to bet between Charles & Ben, and later joined into by me. I have to ask Charles where he got the idea, since it now doesn't appear to be precisely original. Of course, that bet has gone nowhere, but this project is distinctly going somewhere:

allmylifeforsale.net . Here is his ebay site where he's selling all his stuff.

I'm almost tempted to bid on this item, it's so funny:
"pay the Speeding Ticket I got on Tuesday morning"
current price: $1.00
shipping costs: Calculate
time left: 6d 11h 28m

Or maybe I'm just sympathetic due to the $341 (grand total cost) speeding ticket that I got for 42 in a 35 just after i turned 18 (the next day, actually) in Sacramento. My family will remember all the fun (ahem) I had going to Laughs For You And Traffic Too Traffic School, which was a chunk of what made the damn ticket so expensive.

Brian Thompson's allmylifeforsale.net project, which has netted $1054.58 as of 8/13/05, is based on an earlier project, John D. Freyer's AllMyLifeForSale.com (capital letters are mine), which led to a
really cool book of the same name. Freyer's project, according to his book, netted $4,906.52, though I suspect the royalties from the book are paying more handsomely than that. That prior link to Freyer's book has a good description of Freyer's project, and links to booksense.com's excellent engine for finding books through independent bookstores.

What a great couple of projects!

The bet, by the way, had somewhat less artistic intentions: Charles was going to list every single thing he owned on ebay, at a starting bid of $50,000. If any single item sold, he had to pay Ben $1000 or something like that. Obviously, it was an essentially risk-free bet for both of them, except for the significant listing fees that Charles would have incurred on ebay (which seem to be limited to $4.80 per item for basic listing fees, for any item over listed with a starting bid over $500.00.) The kicker for ebay would have been the infamous Final Value Fee, which would amount to roughly $7378, or thereabouts. Then again, since that would leave $42,622 minus paypal or other service fees, the deal would work out okay. I just can really see someone dropping 50 grand for, say, a broken guitar string.

Confidential to TGS :

You done yet?

Salt Lake miscellaney

The free wifi at the library is lovely, but consistently and annoyingly buggy. There are ethernet jacks at every table and all over the place in the floor, but so far from testing, only about 10% work. Pisser, especially when trying to make a camping reservation for Zion National Park for this weekend, and having the stupid stupid stupid wifi drop right at the "Accept" page. Looks, fortunately, like it only went through once.

We made an offer on a house, which turns out to be in short sale, so it'll take a while either way (since all leinholders/banks have to approve any sale.) It's a pretty sweet place, with lots of room for visitors, and probably considerably undervalued, largely since it's filthy, and the dopes don't seem to be aware of the hardwood under the filthy carpet. More when we know, which will likely come in dribs and drabs over the next several weeks.

Momma is taking the train to come see us for four days; should be fun, and she will get the chance (with me) to visit her childhood best friend, who lives in Orem, about 40 miles south of SLC.

Lotsa travel planned for the fall: it's getting a little ridiculous, and a little hard to keep track of. Roughly: Brian Head and Zion NP this weekend; Boston from August 26 to September 1; probably Denver for GABF September 29 to October 1; New York City for a friend's wedding October 6 to 9, then heading up to Boston from October 9-13; fly to the bay area for the beer and cooking class with CKI on October 24, then very briefly back to SLC for dinner with my lovely partner on Oct 26, then on to Seattle, only to drive to Portland for the NLG convention, then drive back to Seattle for another friend's wedding reception; then flying back to SLC November 1. Then to Georgia for the SOAW vigil Nov 17-22; presumptively to Sacramento for X-Giving; then likely to Vermont for X-Mas. Phew!

Okay -- need to check some mortgage rates!

Salt Lake!

Been in town for about 24 hours now, and impressions are favorable. Not a lot of time to write, but there is free wifi (and apprently wired access, and outlets, and comfortable tables) at the gorgeous downtown Salt Lake City public library, with sweeping views of the mountains.

Our new home/condo is beautiful. Three bedrooms, two baths, hardwood floors in the huge main room, dishwasher & laundry in the unit, for starters. And $800/month, with most utilities paid by the owner. Not too damn shabby! The parking stinks, but otherwise it's pretty damn nice. Oh, and did I mention that the building is on the National Register of Historic Places ? Just search down for "Hollywood Apartments".

Okay, time to head back home, to my refrigerator full of Gale Force IPA, and think about feeding myself. With something in addition to the Gale Force, that is.

Confidential to TGS: had to use your previously mentioned gift, but it remains entirely functional. And it's coming in handy: thanks! Call if you desire details. No progress made yet re: other discussons about... ahem. Uncle.

Hotlanta eats and drinks

My primary hope for today is that it rains. Now, suspend your disbelief for a second: no, it's not that I'm excited when it dips down to the high 80s during rain, nor do I like the flooding that inevitably results from rain in overdeveloped Atlanta communities.

Rather, it's because they pour $1 house beers at the Park Tavern on rainy days, and I want to try them without paying full price, since they have received somewhat mixed ratings online.

Mostly what we do in Hotlanta in our free time, besides look for places with air conditioning and free wireless, is eat. Last night, we made a serious mistake of eating at R. Thomas Deluxe Grill, which has a fun menu for vegetarian food, but serious, serious problems. Let's start with the vegan burger being cooked on the same grill as the meat. And our server not washing his hands after going to the FILTHY bathroom. And our server being awol for much of our dinner. (It got to where I made sure to be ready to whip out a credit card the next time he came by, for fear we'd be sitting there another 20 minutes.) And no, the place wasn't at all crowded for dinner at 6pm. Then we can pick on the smaller problems, like the wrong food being brought out, but nobody coming by for 30 minutes so that we could try to have it fixed. Basically, the place just sucked for service, and we won't go back. It's fun to have a 24/7 place that serves vegetarian food, sure, but not like that.

This morning, we had better luck at Radial, which definitely provides a preferred alternative to the pricey and ridiculously busy Flying Biscuit location in Candler Park. Radial's menu is better, simpler, somewhat cheaper, and makes it possible to actually eat breakfast with coffee for under $10 after tip. Unfortunately, the $1.95 coffee was abysmal: truly, almost as bad as McDonald's. The decaf I switched to was actually quite a bit better. I was so unimpressed by the horrible coffee that I won't ever order it again. We'll definitely go back: better food, same drive, and parking available as Flying Biscuit.

But we'll get coffee elsewhere, such as one of my favorite places in Atlanta, JavaVino . They have fantastic coffee, a very pleasant and nicely priced wine list (especially the specials!), free wifi, and are super friendly to boot. I'm gearing up to take them up on their Thursday special, the $18 bottomless glass of wine. Hah!

South

Free wireless has been spotty of late, hence the limited (okay, non-existent) posting. I've been in Hotlanta for about a week, and am wandering now. Today's trip has me in Greenville, South Carolina (a delightful, picturesque town) and continuing on to Charlotte, NC.

Lunch at the Blue Ridge Brewing Company in downtown Greenville (with free wifi all over the place!) has an excellent Total Eclipse XXX Stout: roasty, chocolatey, full, thick, and dark. (And I think it might be $2/pint for Throw Down Thursday!). Better have two. 4.25/4.5 ... YUM!

I visited the Shoeless Joe Jackson statue, and am headed to his gravesite after lunch on my way out of town. Weird, you say? Well, hell, his birthday IS on Saturday.

After that, on to Charlotte, and hopefully tonight's AAA baseball game between the Charlotte Knights and the Indianapolis Indians won't be rained out by the thunderstorms that Hurricane Dennis brought, and Hurricane Emily seems intent on perpetuating.

Then I fly out of Charlotte tomorrow to earn Delta Silver Medallion status with one flight: a ridiculously easy way to gain priority boarding (and in some cases, extra legroom seating and free upgrades). As importantly, though, it was a good justification for a fun road trip.

Greenville is remarkably pleasant so far, at least to my unstudied tourist eye. It's slow, but not dusty, and all the people so far have had (more apparently genuine than in Hotlanta) southern charm. Critically, it's a little cooler than anywhere I've been in Georgia or Tennessee in the last week.

Oh! We went rafting last week with the group on the Ocoee River in southern Tennessee. It was an excellent time, and seven of us had a great time camping the night before in the national forest. Well, it was great until the Russians showed up. A screaming, drunk, tweaking pack of Russians, about eight of them, wandered in to the campsite around 11pm and started wreaking absolute fucking havoc throughout the overflow camping area. They screamed and yelled until about 2am, when they decided to go back to their cars in the (very nearby) parking lot and blast techno music. After a member of our group (too) nicely asked them to turn it off, they did, and retreated to their campsite, where they screamed, yelled, played music, and broke things for another hour or two. Turns out they only sort of vaguely quieted down after one of their group stepped barefoot into some of the broken glass they were creating. Around 4am. Nice.

Anyway, it's more baseball for today, and trying to find some decent beer in the south, always a challenge. This has been a huge score so far: $2 pints of everything, though they are out of the Colonel Paris Pale Ale, so it's another Total Eclipse XXX Stout for me. And the $7.95 oven roasted vegetarian sandwich was excellent, with mounds of goat cheese, and excellent fries. They make their own amber ale ketchup, and apparently their own spicy grainy mustard, both of which are outstanding.

Confidential to TGS :

Oh, I already have such a crackspot scheme, and will be in Atlanta from July 7-24, excepting July 14 and 15 (when I'll be on another crackpot errand to gain Silver Medallion status on Delta, by journeying to Charlotte and flying back to Atlanta, staying just long enough to catch a Charlotte Knights game.)

Start a'lookin'!

San Dee-egg-e

So I'm down in the land of the eternally humid summer for a little less than 48 hours, to do some federal grand jury work.

I arrived early on United, thought repeatedly why I like them so much as an airline (I walked up five minutes before the flight before mine was boarding, and they gave me a boarding pass for an aisle seat with an empty seat to my right.) I mean, they do plenty wrong, but they, more than any other airline I fly, make it up by doing enough right.

On arrival in PB, I parked the car at the library that didn't open until noon, and walked over to the beach. I was just going to walk down the boardwalk, but then the temptation was just too great: I took my shoes and socks off, and walked in the ocean. It was delightful, bordering on transformative.

This will sound ridiculously cliché, but the immense stress of the last few days seemed to just melt away: moving (again) to SLC after relocating to Atlanta for only the month of July; a tumultuous divorce in the family; coming down here on last-minute notice; the closing the practice stresses. All gone, if only for a short time.

I'm now enjoying the public library's free wifi (at every location!) here in PB, and preparing for a 3p client meeting.

More soon. Tonight, a $35 hotel room via Priceline in the heart of the Gaslamp -- that's right, only $12-$13 more than sleeping in the hostels around the corner!

Earthquakes and California attitude

being born and raised in California, it has long been a source of amusement to me the fear, dread, and sometimes terror, that many transplants to the Golden State feel about earthquakes. While not foolproof, it's often a way of identifying people not really from California, much like people who say "Cali". (Note to those from California: if you were born here, and raised here for any significant portion of your life, and you still say "Cali", well, you're stupid.)

Many of us from California regard earthquakes, both as potential threat, and when they happen, as something to be fairly glib about. Now, don't misunderstand me here: people who have lived through the 1989 Loma Prieta quake (which interrupted the start of Game 3 of the Bay Bridge World Series), or Northridge quakes, probably feel somewhat differently about them, likely similar to people who live in the high desert of southern California, which gets earthquakes pretty constantly. But those of us in most of California tend to find the idea of earthquakes borderline entertaining.

So this morning, I felt what I thought was an earthquake at 11:47am. I'm going to go ahead and admit the slightly embarassing circumstances that probably made it possible for me to feel this particular seismic event: I had only recently woken up, and was sitting on the toilet, reading.

I felt like the toilet (and, by extension, me) were wobbling forward and backward, and I looked down at a water bottled that was sitting on a perch of several books on the floor, in whcih the water was sloshing around a bit. By the time I looked at my watch, it was basically over.

So, Dr. Smartypants, who likes to follow earthquakes, soon after came upstairs to chat, and I sent her down to check on this potential earthquake. Sure enough, there was a magnitude 4.8 earthquake 5 miles N-NW of Tahoe Vista, California at 11:45:58am, about 95 miles away as the crow flies.

Whoopee! I was right! See what I mean? It's just fun to feel earthquakes here most of the time.

Sure enough,

I think Jim Tracy is angry. What a great picture.

More on how the Spankeez suck

Phew! I was wondering if I was going to have to post an eat-my-words e-mail after the Spankeez pounded the (lowly) Devil Rays yesterday 20-11, and Centimeter Jeter went 5-6 with a homer, and A-Rod, Twitch, Matsui, and Posada all homered, with a ridiculous 13-run eighth inning (including back-to back-to back home runs.)

Good news! The hated Yankeez (37-35) got spanked today by the even lowlier Devil Rays (26-47). Jeter was 0-5, Williams 1-3, Matsui 0-3, Giambi 0-1 (pinch hitting). Only Twitch Sheffield had a good day, 2-4 with a home run.

The 26 and 47 Devil Rays are now 6 and 3 in their meetings this season with the Yankees. Ha!

Confidential to The Good Senator:

Wanna go back to the south?

www.javavino.com:
ALL SUMMER: * THUR - $18 bottomless (wine) glass

Here is their wine list.

Oh, and they sell rainforest friendly coffee, and have free wireless.

nowhere, is where I've been

Blogging opportunities and/or energy have been limited of late, as I've been sifting through 142 file boxes from dad's storage, going through document by document, determining what needs to kept, what needs to be shredded, and what can simply be recycled (the overwhelming majority so far.) It's a god-awful fucking miserable task, and the house looks like shit with boxes stacked everywhere until I complete it, or at least make a dent.

That said, it has provided the opportunity to listen to plenty of baseball games on XM, and play lots of online poker, both of which I can do easily enough while going through files (often all three simultaneously.)

On the note of baseball, I was struck this morning by the San Francisco Chronicle's listing of the top 52 paid players in baseball. Don't ask me why it's 52, other than it might have been neat to them to list 52 since four players are tied for that mark, at $9,000,000 per year, and three of them play for west coast teams: Bret Boone (Seattle), Troy Glaus (Arizona), Ryan Klesko (San Diego), and Greg Maddux (duh: Chicago Cubs).

More interesting about the list though is how clearly it demonstrates the hated Skankeez (oops, Yankees) monetary advantage: they have ten players in the top 52 (the top 39, actually). There are 30 teams in baseball. Do the math.

What is pleasing, though, is that of the 34-32, 3rd place in the Al East, five games behind Baltimore, arrogant, nasty Skankeez overpaid player list, only one of them, Alex Rodriguez, is actually on the AL leader list in more than one category (A-Rod for runs, RBI, and home runs), and only a grand total of three Yankees are on the AL leaders list (as published in the Chron) at all: Hideki Matsui, not on the list with his $8 million salary, is fourth for doubles with 18; Randy Johnson, 15th on the salary list at $15,419,815, is second in strikeouts at 91 (30 behind the AL leading Johan Santana of the Twins, who will earn $4,750,000 this year.) (What a long, nasty run-on sentence that was. So sue me. Or get your own damn blog.)

Let's see what the other Yankees on the overpaid player list are doing, shall we?

4. Derek "Arrogance" Jeter, SS, $19,600,000: hitting .299, 6 HR, 26 RBI, 44 runs, 8 SB
5. Mike "The 19 Million Dollar Moose" Mussina, SP, 19,000,000: 7-4, 3.89 ERA, 61 K, 21 BB, 1.34 WHIP
11. Kevin "Angry" Brown, SP, $15,714,286: 4-6, 5.48 ERA, 45 K, 15 BB, 1.61 WHIP
16. Jason "Steroids" Giambi, 1B, $13,428,571: hitting .242, 5 HR, 20 RBI, 19 runs, 0 SB
25. Bernie "Backup" Williams, CF, $12,357,143: hitting .238, 3 HR, 20 RBI, 16 runs, 1 SB
27. Gary "Twitch" Sheffield, RF, $11,496,689: hitting .300, 10 HR, 41 RBI, 40 runs, 6 SB
30. Jorge "Bare Hands" Posada, C, $11,000,000: hitting .297, 9 HR, 34 RBI, 27 runs, 1 SB
39 (tie). Mariano "Pitched 25 Innings This Year" Rivera, RP, $10,500,000: 3-2, 1.05 ERA, 29 K, 9 BB, 15 saves

What a bunch of overrated, overpaid trash. Only Rodriguez, Sheffield, Posada, and Rivera are even coming close to having respectable seasons, and there is no way I will ever accept that A-Rod, currently placing in only four major AL leader categories (he's third in walks), is worth $25.7 million a year. Not when he also lists above the fold in strikeouts (46) and caught-stealing (3, when he only has 6 successful steals???).

Confidential to TGS :

> 1) Did too, between refills at the airport. It's not my fault you were too
> drunk off your ass to care.

Alright, wiseass, first off, there is a not insignificant difference between "to care" and "to comprehend".

> I was a little surprised you didn't make a bigger deal of it, though.

Well, next time, don't sneak it in around snipey comments about the crazy woman sitting next to me.

> Your response was, if I recall correctly, "WHAAAT?????!!! JEEEEEZUS
> CHRIST, give me that!"

No comment.

> (insert lunge for beer here.)

Talk to my lawyer. And get your own.

> 2. I did go to CVS yesterday and purchased a bright yellow, perfect
> storm-esque poncho for my backpack. You thought the plastic socks looked lame.

HA! HA! HA! What is the hip internet abbreviation for this? Oh, I know: LOFL!!!

> p.p.s. Are ya gonna let me know what it is first?

Hmmmmmmmmm... NO!

See, buddy, it's like this: you disappointed me while in search of (ahem), and so, unless and until I get a detailed report of (ahem), you don't get to know SHIT. ¿claro?

Gale Force IPA!!!

Today we bottled our brew-on-premises beer, named Gale Force IPA. See, the recipe we used was called Trade Winds IPA, but, well, we ignored the specified hop bill (Goldings & Galena for bittering, Goldings for "Flavoring", Fuggles and Cascade for aroma, and more Fuggles and Cascade for dry hopping.) Instead, we used Centennial and Galena for bittering, Columbus and Centennial for flavoring, Centennial and Chinook for aroma, and Columbus and Cascade for dry hopping.

Now THAT'S a hop bill. Heh.

Oh, and we put in an intentionally excessive amount of malt extract and specialty grains.

Short story: it kicks ass. Good, good, good stuff. Which the faithful readers of this blog will have first access to, whether I already know you personally OR YOU ARE A LURKER. Just e-mail me, and we'll talk about beer transferance.

Reader Poll

So, how do you all like (or not) my actually using capital letters to begin my sentences, and for most proper nouns? I decided it's somewhat more readable this way.

And for you lurkers, I know you're out there. This question is directed at you, as an easy way to tell me who you are. Find my email address at the bottom of this page in the links section, take out all extraneous characters, and respond immediately. Or I'll be upset.

Confidential To The Good Senator:

1) You didn't tell me you were going to fucking florida.

2) But congrats on being smart enough to bring a raincoat. Did you know that raincoats are made for people who live in ridiculous, barely inhabitable areas, e.g., Seattle and Florida, that are actually completely waterproof? You know, the yellow rubber ones that make you look like an extra in the movie version of The Perfect Storm?

3) Have you noticed that our blogs increasingly are almost like an email exchange to one another, with occasional entertainment value for others?

p.s. You are NOT permitted to travel to Cuba until this storm passes. ¿claro?

p.p.s. I still haven't drunk your first present. But I might soon. Like tonight. yum. I'll let you know how it is.

a funny thing happened on my way back home

Well, besides my getting violently airsick on the AcK flight into Seattle. What happened is this: I had a bomber of Elysian Immortal (confidential to TGS: no, this WASN'T your present), that I decided to transfer to a gatorade bottle solely because it was less prone to breakage in my carry-on. Ahem.

Anyway, it just so happens that it was an orange flavor gatorade bottle, which, while it was a lovely color match, imparted a rather bizarre orange flavor. I can't say, however, that it was altogether unpleasant, and now, two days later, I'm drinking it out of the fridge and rather enjoying it, even though it's as flat as a pancake. It's quite a bit like Buffalo Bill's Orange Blossom Cream Ale, actually. (Notably, the Immortal is a pretty lame IPA to begin with, so the orange flavor really didn't have a meaningful hop profile to compete with.)

Ahhhhh. Guess I should put the Elysian Pumpkin ale in the fridge for tonight's drinking (and no, TGS, that wasn't it, either. So neehh.)

sitting at the desk

with the shiatsu chair massager on, a raspberry imperial stout in the glass, a poker freeroll starting in 35 minutes, and baseball on the XM radio. life is good.

back from ak

two more pleasant first class flights (no, we didn't pay for them, we used miles) on AcK Airlines. typically, the first flight (ANC-SEA) was late, for two entirely different sets of stated reasons. at check-in, and only after inquiring, i was told it was potentially delayed to accommodate late-arriving passengers on another flight(s). then at the gate, it was annouced to be late just so that mechanics could check one little thing. i was left to wonder if AcK Airlines employees are just told to make up whatever will sound best at the moment.

and actually, the end of the first flight wasn't so pleasant: i was hit with apparent airsickess for only the second time in my life. (the first being when A was taking, ahem, liberties with the two-seater Piper Cherokee he was flying me around in in Massachusetts.) that first time wasn't bad, however, since i followed the directions on the airsickness bag, which told me to focus on the farthest away stationaryt thing i could. within about ten seconds, i felt better. yesterday, however, i woke up from drowsing/napping, and felt the violent need to go to the bathroom. while sitting on the toilet in the ridiculously cramped forward lav ont he 737-400, i was suddently glad for how tiny it was, since i broke into a complete body sweat, and sort of collapsed against the wall. within a few minutes, they announced we were in our final descent into seattle, so i had to struggle out.

we arrived home via a ride from mom's brand spanking new hyundai elantra 5-door hatchback, and i read for a while, then promptly went to sleep, with directions to J to not wake me up in the morning. i slept soundly until 11 this morning, finished my book, and caught the last few innings of the excellent Cubs -- Blue Jays game.

the book, Fortunate's Rocks, by Anita Shreve, reminded me repeatedly of Dar Williams' lyrics from the unfortunately named song "Teenagers Kick Our Butts":
"We read junk novels on the plane..."
the book itself was fine, reasonably interesting, and an easy bit of intellectual junk food. i think Shreve was attempting to sympathetically discuss class consciousness at the turn of the 20th century, and in this she failed except for those who might be completely unable to do any bit of historical or class analysis. but it was an entertaining novel, albeit with an outrageously trite ending, which seems to be Shreve's forte. (i won't indulge myself in spoiling it, unless you want me to. e-mail me for details.)

beer and midnight sun

Saturday:
lunch at Bear Tooth: IPA
bus to airport, picked up rental car
drove to Valley
Regal Eagle in Eagle River looks nasty, changed, and so effectively closed (signs advertising Bud Select and Becks as beer specials)
lunch/early dinner at Great Brear in Wah-hah-sillo-ay: excellent Beary Strong (8% raspberry strong ale), decent Big Su Strong Ale (8%), excellent if slightly sweet Three Bruins Tripel, excellent Arskigger Scottish Ale (8%).
dinner & drinks at Moose's Tooth: '02 barleywine, then Cask IPA, then '03 barleywine

Sunday: samplers at Homer Brewing Co., bought half gallon soda bottle (best growler vessel EVER) of special Oatmeal Stout ($13 total)
lunch at Finn's pizza on Homer Spit, pint of Homber Brewing Company's Broken Birch Bitter (plus some Oatmeal Stout in the car)
dinner was picnic style in the car, cheese, onion, and mustard sandwiches from Safeway (plus a swig)

Monday: planned journey out to Midnight Sun BC to sample the wares, likely dinner at Moose's Tooth

Tuesday: likely lunch at Orzo, or, gosh, Glacier is right next door...
then flight home.

beer and airports

i would have blogged about it myself, but The Good Senator managed to describe our airport beer escapade with one of the best posts ever. so i don't have to.

wastin' away in Anchoraguaville

lookin' for, maaaahhyyy lost pint of beer.

it's been good to us. we've been to Glacier three times. the best thing is is a Cask IPA, and boy, is it a doosie. dry hopped with Crytsal and Amarillo, and it's a damn work of art. the standard IPA is also solidly drinkable, and the Jim Beam Bock is decent, but underwhelming.

Snow Goose has the same extraordinary views as always, though the beer hasn't been that amazing in two visits. the cask is Urban Wilderness (pale ale), and is pleasant, but just not in the same class as the Glacier cask.

Humpy Dumpy is pretty much nasty and smoky, as always, and the tap list just isn't that amazing for someone who lives in california; it's definitely not worth dealing with the repulsive smoke.

Humpy's sister bar, Sub Zero, is chic as all get out, and has a pretty extraordinary list of Belgians in bottles (i drank a lovely Roquefort 8, $12.50 for a well poured 333ml bottle in proper glassware). J had Chimay on tap, which was nice, and there were lovely free appetizers for First Friday, the downtown art opening. (their exhibit was the winners of the Anchorage Press' Post-It Note Art Contest.

we walked to Spenard and peered in on the Bear Tooth, but the movie availbility was weak, so we'll wait for beer until Moose's Tooth tomorrow, when we have a rental car.

speaking of tomorrow, we're thinking about waking up a little early for the farmer's market across the parking lot (i'll be on the lookout for nagoonberries), then picking up the car, after lunching at La Mex in Spenard (the downtown location is closed!). then we'll probably make a trip to the valley and Great Bear, and eyeball the ever-elusive Regal Eagle on the way back through Eagle River.

YUM!

anchoragua tomorrow!

game plan, in order of proximity to our hotel:
Glacier
Snow Goose
Sub Zero (a NON-SMOKING venture/affiliate of Da Hump)
Bear Tooth

then when we have a rental car, starting Saturday:

Moose's Tooth
Midnight Sun
Great Bear
Homer Brewing

oh, and maybe we'll do some hiking.

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more computer foolings

I successfully installed a DVD burning drive, in about fifteen minutes. The most difficult part was unplugging the power cord from the back of the drive in the cramped space of the mini-tower. Now I can easily backup the digital photography that has been occupying HUGE amounts of space on the 80gb hard drive.

XM satellite radio: how did I live without it?

I finally succumbed because of the baseball: every team, every game, all season. And I'm loving that. Increasingly, though, I'm enjoying the regular radio programming. Example: Ethel, channel 47, is one of the 100% commerical free music stations. Their last five songs: two Modest Mouse songs, then a Pogues song, then a random Sublime song, and now Primus. Fun stuff.

Jose Canseco's Big Shitty Book: Juiced

I just finished reading Canseco's 284 pages of whining, self ego-stroking, tell-all babble. What a piece of crap. I shouldn't even have bothered, and in fact, had no plans to bother, until I saw it sitting on the new arrival shelf at our local public library. I did have to snicker at his notes that he didn't care what people thought of his book, as long, of course, as they paid full price for it. Ha, ha.

He spends most of the book on a central theme: I'm a human, everyone is a human, but boy, am I just about the greatest human to ever grace baseball with my presence. He whines a lot about his performance not being what it could have been, had he not been injured, but he also whines about people saying he was always injured. He insists that steroids, properly administered (he refers to himself as The Godfather of Steroids, also The Chemist), don't increase risk of injury. So how does he explain his persistent injuries? Well, he doesn't: he mentions some of them, like the three back surgeries, but insists that steroids where why he recovered. He pooh-poohs, without any explanation or stated basis, the idea that Ken Caminiti and Lyle Alzado's deaths were steroid related. His only basis for this is a sort of contorted reverse logic: because there was no scientific proof that steroids caused either death, therefore, it is clear that they did not. Hmmmm...

Canseco repeatedly claims he was framed, then railroaded into taking a plea stemming from a barfight where he claims he didn't preally hurt anyone and acted only in self defense by putting his hand out to motion to someone to stop. (Context: he also mentions that he holds black belts in three martial arts: Japanese Karate, Tae Kwon Do, and Muay Thai.)

He insists that his probation violation for failing a drug test was clearly the result of someone swapping urine samples with him. This, at the end of a 284 page book extolling the magical virtues of steroids, and The Chemist's proud use of them?

He insists that he is not only the nicest guy ever, but that he is also not a domestic abuser. This despite admitting that during one argument where his then wife was sitting in the front seat, he reached in front to grab her by the hair to get her attention? That in another incident with another wife, he and she were driving down the road fighting and screaming in SEPARATE cars, and, oops, wouldn't you know it? Their darn cars collided.

He talks about being a fun-loving, easy-going, cuddly guy, then explains away his arrests for carrying loaded firearms on hospital campuses, beating his wives, and just happening to have a machine gun nicknamed "Street Sweeper" in his closet that he was going he kill himself with (he put the gun down on his bed, and decided to cuddle his infant daughter instead. It was left unclear whether he put away the machine gun before cuddling with his daughter.)

Canseco repeatedly refers to his own superhuman abilities, and how amazing he was, and at one point, says he was the greatest player in baseball. He's especially proud of being the AL Rookie of the Year in 1986, and of his 40/40 season: 42 home runs, 40 stolen bases, resulting in his being voted the unanimous American League MVP in 1988. Yes, this is something to be proud of.

But the greatest player in baseball? The most amazing physical speciem to grace the game? A poster boy for why steroid use is so great for professional athletes? HUH? Let's review his somewhat checkered and inconsistent career: he led the league in home runs only twice: 1988 (42) and 1991 (44). He hit over 40 home runs only one other time: 1998 (46), which placed him third on the league.

What else did he do in 1998, you might wonder? He led the league in strikeouts, with 159. (He struck out 1942 times in his career, in 7057 at-bats.) His career batting average is .266; in only three seasons out of seventeen did he hit over .300, and one of these, 1985, with a .302 batting average, he only had 96 at-bats in 29 games.

Canseco go on and on about his running abilities, especially for someone so large and muscular: for example, he brags repeatedly about running the 40 yard dash in 4.3 seconds, and at one point, makes the preposterous claim to have run it in 3.9 seconds (page 231). After those 40 steals in 1988, his next highest total was 29 in 1998, then 26 in 1991, and then only four other seasons did he have more then 10 steals. He was only in the top ten for steals one time, in 1988, when his 40 steals placed him fourth in the league.

How ridiculous are his claims about running? Well, for starters, he only lists his times in the 40 yard dash, a distance/event that the IAAF, track & field's international governing body, doesn't even recognize or record (The shortest distance the IAAF recognizes for world-record purposes is an indoor 50 meters, or about 54 yards, per this excellent article on the official site of the U.S. Olympic Team.) That article goes on to debunk the mythic 40 yard times that many NFL players put up.

In my research, I can't find ANY serious claims that ANYONE has EVER run the 40 yard dash faster than 4.15 seconds, even with extremely questionable timing methodology.

Oh, apparently, Canseco is explaining his ridiculous 3.9 second claim as a typo.

Even more fun/ny: in this article he's quoted as saying he ran a 3.39 second 40-yard dash!

This isn't to say that Canseco's book is entirely without merit: it did bring the topic of cheating through steroids to the attention of the public and the snoozing congress, it also speaks to the undeniable truth of racism in baseball. Sadly, though, Canseco is such a fucking ridiculous clown that the couple of important messages he has are lost in the fog.

why computers really aren't such a great thing:

1) because they stress me out.
2) because I foolishly rely on CNET to be worth a damn.

I agreed, on the suggestion of Dr. Smartypants, to install an additional RAM module in our desktop machine (a somewhat clunky emachines T2484 that is a couple of years old.)

We were at Fry's at this ridiculous sale on May 20, which included such super buys as internal DVD burners for $39, with no fucking irritating rebates. We also got a 512mb DIMM RAM module for $49, with a $30 mail-in fucking irritating rebate.

So after looking at the RAM for a little over a week, I finally decided to try to install it, since I am butting up on Fry's fucking irritating 14 day return policy on computer equipment.

So I installed popped open the case (ignoring the emachines tamper sticker, since we're well past the warranty period anyway), installed the memory module in the empty slot in what seemed to be a process far too easy to be true, closed the case, and booted up. You can guess the pre-lunchline: it was, indeed, far too easy to be true.

The machine started up fine, but didn't recognize the new memory. (Still only showing 256mb.) So I cracked it open again, and tried re-seating the memory: still no recognition. Then I did the minimal troubleshooting that CNET's SHITTY guide to installing new memory recommends: I unseated and re-seated both the existing and the new memory modules. (Yes, all of you wiseasses out there: I did carefully ground myself EVERY time before I touched either of the memory modules.)

Crisis ensues: now the machine won't boot up at all, and instead emits a LOUD, prolonged (two to three seconds) beeping noise on startup. Sigh. I resign myself the the new memory being defective, crack open the case again, and pluck it out.

Crisis now at catastrophe level: same result, even with the existing, factory installed memory the only memory in the machine. I congratulate myself for backing up all of the most critical data before engaging in this fool's errand, and make a crisis phone call to my trusty computer expert, Mister .'.

I leave Mister .'. a whiny voicemail, and decide to go research my problem a little further. Well, it only takes me about twenty seconds of reading a competent guide on installing memory, on crucial.com, to come across this critical point, clearly expressed in two different places:

Push Hard
When the ejector pins snap up around the module your memory is installed.
...
Use your thumbs to press the module into the slot. Press hard! It takes about 20 lb of pressure to get the module properly inserted in the slot. When you hear a "click" and both side ejector clips snap up around the module, you know it is installed correctly.

Indeed, I've now seen elsewhere on the web that it can take up to 40 pounds of pressure to properly install RAM modules, and most sites recommend 20 to 30 pounds.

To finish this already boring story: I cracked open the case for baout the tenth time, and yeah, when you really apply pressure, they seat fine, and work great. The computer is now veritably clipping along with 768mb of RAM. Hoo-ha!

Dear Day's Inn:

Submitted via their online form, regarding their hotel on West Diversey in Chicago:

Hello, I just thought I'd let you know that because your 800 phone staff declined to match or even come close to a rate from your own website ($63/night), I cancelled my previously booked reservation ($79.95/night, reservation ########), and booked a better rate at another hotel. So much for "Unbeatable Rates"!

pi

3.1415926535897932384626433832795028841971693993751058209749445923078164062862089986280348253421170679

who doesn't love to calculate pi to 32 million digits? i only did two million, which took one minute, fifty-nine seconds.

i'm also happy to report that my 700m has no dead pixels!

beer and feet

today S and i bottled the Downspout Stout (unoriginal, i know, but i had to pick something to start calling it. suggestions are invited.) it's really more like a porter, FULL of coffee flavor, slightly sweet, and tiny hints of roastiness. yum. yield was almost four gallons, so volunteers are needed for drinking!

in other news, anyone know these feet? they should be returned to their owner ASAP, as they seem in serious need of help of some kind. please advise.

hotel reds

sent today:

[dangr-us letterhead here]

Red Lion Hotel
Salt Lake Downtown
161 West 600 South
Salt Lake City, UT 84101

Red Lion and WestCoast Hotels
Business Office
W. 201 North River Dr.
Spokane, WA 99201

6 May 2005

To whom it may concern:

I recently had the opportunity to stay at the Red Lion, Salt Lake Downtown, April 29 - May 2. The staff was excellent, the location ideal, the views of the Wasatch Range extraordinary, the free WiFi convenient, and the rooms comfortable: I will probably never return. Most things in the hotel were as good as they could be, and for this class of hotel, quite excellent. However, the pervasive cigarette smoke in my two different rooms was intolerable, and exacerbated my asthma for much of my three day stay in Salt Lake City.

Some background: in advance of my stay, I called and requested a non-smoking room. I was told this would not be a problem, since the hotel was at 40% capacity for that weekend, and I would not be assigned a smoking room unless I requested one. On arrival at the hotel, I requested a room with a view of the mountains to the east, if there was something available that was non-smoking. The desk employee, who was extremely friendly and efficient, gave me a room in the main tower, on the top floor (9th) in that building, with a breathtaking view of the mountains. I was delighted. I settled in to prepare for my business the next day, and then went for a walk around Salt Lake City.

On my return, I noticed the room seemed quite smoky. I was surprised by this, since the hallway itself wasn’t smoky. I discovered the primary source of the smoke was the vent above the mini-bar. I opened the sliding doors to the small balcony to air the room out, and hoped it was a fluke. On my return from dinner, it was again quite smoky, but leaving the balcony doors wide open seemed to let enough air in to mitigate it. This was a workable solution until it became clear that cigarette smoke was billowing in from other balconies: apparently, people were considerate enough to not smoke in non-smoking rooms, but not considerate enough to realize that the balconies were very much in a shared airspace.

It was late, and I was tired. I decided to just close the balcony door and deal with the stale, foul smelling smoke coming in through the ventilation system, rather than invite plumes of fresh, foul-smelling smoke from as many as a dozen other balconies. The next afternoon, my business partner arrived, and immediately on entering the room, asked me if I had a smoking room. I agreed it was disgusting, and went down to the front desk to see about changing it. The front desk was busy with arriving guests at the time, so we went to our business appointments and dinner, and I went back to the front desk that night. The woman at the desk was friendly and understanding about it, though she expressed surprise that smoke would be a problem, since the 9th floor was, according to her, an entirely non-smoking floor. Nevertheless, she happily agreed to move me to another room, and within minutes, I was moving my things to the sixth floor of the main (north) tower.

While this room initially seemed better, it quickly became clear that the entire hotel was going to be a problem for smoke, since people on nearly every floor were on their balconies, at one time or another, smoking. In other words, I could not leave my balcony doors open to get the delightful fresh air; instead, all I would get was the foul, noxious cigarette smoke of other guests. Indeed, my next-door neighbor was smoking on his balcony, as were at least ten other people on various floors around me.

I had another couple of very minor complaints: the pool and spa, advertised on the hotel’s web page, was (apparently perpetually) in a state of remodeling. The tub in the second room backed up to several inches of standing water during my shower on Sunday morning. But in truth, these were minor irritations, the likes of which can, and do, occur at any hotel. The smoke being everywhere, however, was the worst I’ve ever experienced at any hotel in the United States.

Some of it probably has to do with the hotel design: the nice curve which allows for beautiful views for so many rooms also means that the airspace is more shared than might be the case on a flat wall. I do understand that, as a business, you need to provide accommodations which are acceptable to all of your guests. I further understand that this means smokers and non-smokers. However, it seems that there are a couple of things you could do to lessen the problem: first, it’s crazy to have non-smoking floors above smoking floors, both for ventilation purposes, and the outside balconies. If smoking was explicitly prohibited (and accordingly signed) in the rooms and on the balconies of all lower floors, say, first through fifth, then it could be allowed on the upper floors, six through nine, with much less impact. Better still would be to prohibit smoking (and post corresponding signage) on all of the outside balconies on at least one of the (five? six?) sides of the hotel. Ideal, though admittedly a significant undertaking, would be to completely prohibit, and sign, smoking in all areas of one of the two buildings (either the north or the south building.)

I am not telling you how to run your business, any more than I would expect you to tell me how to run mine. Rather, I only offer these suggestions as workable ways to make your hotel vastly more pleasant to guests, who, like myself, are very sensitive to smoke, as well as those who simply don’t like it, and don’t want to expose themselves or their families to it.

In the next six to eight months, I expect to return to downtown Salt Lake City for business between ten and fifteen times. Were it not for the smoke problem, I expect that I would return regularly to the Red Lion, as I was genuinely delighted with most other aspects of the hotel, especially the staff, location, and scenic view. Unfortunately, if the smoke problem remains as it is, I will not return, nor will I recommend it to friends and colleagues.

I look forward to your response(s), by return letter or e-mail, and thank you very much for your time.

Sincerely,
[dangr]

beer! (what else?)

was at brew it up! both last night and today. the Csar's Tar (imperial stout) and Skydiver Barleywine were both outstanding, and there is an excellent Belgian red style called Arik the Red on, also wonderful.

today i went down at happy hour with J, with the explicit mission of scheduling some brew-on-premises lovin', and we are set. on 5/20, we'll be brewing a modified version version of their Trade Winds IPA, with a fully customized hop bill, full of such lovelies as Galena, Columbus, Centennial, and Chinook. yum! (screw the Goldings, Fuggles, and Cascade.)

salt lake goodness!

i'm pleasantly delighted with SLC. the views are shockingly anchoragua-like (especially vivid since The Good Senator joined me this weekend, and we couldn't stop commenting how much it was like the Alpenglow of Moose's Tooth fame.)

we drank a whole lot of beer at several brewpubs (links to reviews likely to follow), i went to a very pleasant AAA baseball game friday night, and we basically had a good time.

we had to move hotel rooms, since all the fucking rude assholes blew their smoke into our room, via vents and balconies. fortunately, both rooms shared a SPECTACULAR view of the mountains to the east. the views in SLC, generally, are breathtaking. i'm falling in love with this city, quickly, and surprisingly. it's similar to colorado springs, in that when you drive around a corner, you're just blasted with amazing mountain views. in the springs, though, you only get them to the west. in SLC, you get them to the north, and east, and south, and southwest, and northwest. and due west, you ask? the great salt lake. (stinky, but pretty.)

confidential to all the disgusting women at trolley square: big stupid tall ugly heels with jeans? you're not hot. you're just foul. go crawl back under your rock.

the house hunt continues in earnest: looking like we really want to stick to the central city/downtown/Liberty Park area.

confidential to all the monied yuppies who are driving the housing prices up in Sugarhouse: you're lame. the neighborhood is sterile and boring (compared to many other areas of SLC), it borders on the freeway and a disgusting strip mall, and it's about as far away from SLC as you can get and still be in SLC. hot tip: just go to Sandy, buy a seven bedroom house, a Volvo turbowagon, a purebred golden retriever, and overpriced, anorexia-inducing gymnastics lessons, and get it over with.

overall: very entertaining, fun, laugh-filled, successful trip. (the empties are clanking against one another on the desk as i type this.)

ultra marathons

reading the newspaper this morning, i ran across yet another article on Dean Karnazes, the ultra runner whose recent book, Ultramarathon Man , is just hanging on to the NY Times Best-seller list for Hardcover Non-Fiction, at #34.

i've read lots of coverage of Karnazes recently, who without question is super badass. his goal has long been to run a 300 mile ultra marathon without sleeping. this seemed a pretty good goal, and he's attempted it a couple of times at least, once running 262 miles.

well, this seemed pretty damn impressive to me, until this morning when i read, for this first time, about Pam Reed, an ultra runner from Tucson who not only has already run 300 miles , but also has won and set a women's course record in what is widely considered one of, if not the, most difficult running race in existence, the Badwater Ultramarathon , a 135-mile run from Badwater, Death Valley, the lowest point in the country, to the slopes of Mt. Whitney, the highest peak in the lower 48.

without taking anything away from Karnazes, who is certainly amazing (and a freak, like Reed, and like all ultra runners) it's hard for me to understand why i have heard minimally about Reed. is it that Reed hasn't written a book and gone on a 40 city promotional tour for it (i don't think so: i'd read all about him before the book and the tour). or is it gender?

bank troubles

bad day in bankland: today I was notified that my online account access has been suspended for Wells Fargo. and Regions Bank. (but they kindly offered to let me unlock my online access by inputting my ATM card number and PIN.) and UnionPlanters Bank. and M&I Marshall & Ilsley Bank. (where the hell is that? looks like the UK.) and "Bank of the West" wrote on behalf of WaMu (how nice of them!).

and to top it all off, I can't use ebay anymore because i've used false or misleading contact information. (ebay was so worked up about it that they notified me twice.) dang.

who falls for this shit? apparently enough people to make it worth the time of the scammers, since these seem to be increasing every day.

thoughts on the new papa: Pope Benedict XVI, a.k.a. God's Rottweiler; Nazi Youth and multi-talented Nazi soldier

So, let's review:

• He was a Nazi.
  
• BUT BUT BUT! he deserted.
  
• Well, yeah: in late April or early May 1945. For the historically deficient among us, the Germans surrendered on May 8, 1945. Hitler killed himself on April 30, 1945.
  
• Ratzinger was in Hitler's Youth, but got the benefits thereof (not being jailed, persecuted, or killed for refusal to pariticpate) without most of the obligations (attending regular meetings) when the first of many patrons, a Nazi mathematics professor, arranged for him to receive tutition scholarship payments without having to attend meetings and gatherings.
  
• Then Ratzinger served in the flak, or German anti-aircraft corps, guarding a BMW engine aircraft plant.
  
• Then they went a couple of other places: Unterföhring, northwest of Munich, and briefly to Innsbruck.
  
• From Innsbruck, his unit went to Gilching to protect a jet fighter base and to attack allied bombers as they massed to begin their runs towards Munich. At Gilching, Ratzinger served in telephone communications.
  
• After his unit was released from the flak, he was drafted and entered the Reichsarbeitdienst (RAD). Apparently Ratzinger's main duties were setting up setting up anti-tank defenses (read: landmines and minefields) to prepare for the expected Russian/Allied invasion; however, the RAD has such varied duties as supplying frontline troops with food and ammunition, repairing damaged roads, constructing and repairing airstrips, constructing coastal fortifications (including the Atlantic Wall), manned fortifications, and helping to guard vital locations and prisoners.
  
• Non-combat roles included training as anti-aircraft units and deploy,emt as RAD Flak batteries. (Sound familiar?)
  
• Several RAD units also saw ground combat on the eastern front as infantry. As the German defenses crumbled toward the end fo the war, more and more RAD were committed to direct combat. In the final months of the war the RAD formed 6 major frontline units, which saw heavy fighting.
  
• Ratzinger was released from the RAD, and promptly was drafted into, and entered, an infantry unit. He was in the infantry until his desertion.
  

BUT BUT BUT no sweat: even potential critics are falling over themselves to apologize for his Nazi past: "Membership in the Hitler Youth doesn't disqualify someone from being Pope," Efraim Zuroff (a 'Nazi hunter' and director of the Israel office of the Simon Wiesenthal Center.)

Well, okay: but how about Hitler's Youth, then a Nazi anti-aircraft unit, then a Nazi laying minefields against an Allied invasion, then being in the Nazi infantry?

Planned next installment: from Nazi youth, to hypocritical elitist intelligentsia. (Fun fact: Ratzinger speaks ten languages, including German, Italian, fluent French, English, and ecclesiastical Latin. Fun sidenote: Ratzinger, in the heady days of Vatican II, when he was considered a liberal, once denounced the use of Latin at Mass as archaic, but now he digs it, and reportedly plans to give his first homily in Latin.)

baseball!

i love it. it's the only sport i bother to follow, and it defines early summer days like this: bright, sunny, 80 degrees, mid-april, with the A's vs. Angels game on the radio, 0-0 in the bottom of the 8th inning, runners first and third.

i went with E & K to the A's home opener last monday night, to see them get their ass handed to them by the Blue Jays (10-3.) the game was a lot of fun to go to, despite the abysmal fans we were sitting around in the cheap ($10) seats. the most represented population seemed to be stupid little hoodlums, who clearly didn't know anything about baseball other than it provides tough gangsta caps for them to color in all black with sharpies and wear backwards. several stupid, rude assholes in our section smoked constantly despite people asking them nicely not to (which would have merely complied with the rules at Oakland Coliseum, oops I mean Network Associates Coliseum, oops I mean McAfee Coliseum.) and for that matter, the Coliseum's smoking policy results in the entire View Level (read: cheap seats) concourse being like a pub. oh, actually, you can go to any pub in Oakland and revel in the smoke-free atmosphere since 1995. i think i'll send the Coliseum a nastygram.

homebrew: Decomposed Saint IPA! (and Terri Schiavo)

S and i bottled the homebrew yesterday. (well, actually, i did most of the bottling, as he had to drive his kid back to the kid's mom's house.) it turned out sweet and strong, with an unnaturally high final gravity (1.026). notably, though, we didn't put in nearly enough plain water to the primary fermentation, so this probably contributed to bizarrely high gravity readings.

about a week ago, the time had come to name the beer. i wanted to name it something pretty messed up (those who know me can email me for the story). S balked a little, and we discussed a story he says he saw in the news about the pope, that if his body lies in the grave for three years, and they dig it up, and it isn't decomposed, then it's evidence of his being a saint. so we named the beer Decomposed Saint IPA. (if you can believe it, this was a little less spooky than what i wanted to name it.)

here's some information on this idea of el papa and other would-be saints defying the laws of science and nature:

slate.msn.com/id/2116395/:
"If John Paul II is eventually canonized, he might not have to worry. Some Catholics believe that the bodies of saints are "incorruptible." That is, they never decompose."

that Slate page links to a seriously bizarre page about "Incorrupt Bodies of the Saints", which links to another bizarre, as well as silly and longwinded, rant, found by clicking on the "Terri Schiavo, Saint?" link. i don't even want to provide hyperlinks here, since i don't want to make it easy for them to track back to my blog. i also don't want to be directly responsible for your having wasted four to six minutes of your life reading that crap that you'll never get back.

all digital wedding photography!

a couple of weeks ago, i photographed a wedding. (entirely in digital, which i think is the way the entire industry is doing to go in the next few years. i'm a little shocked it isn't already going that way.) i can do it MUCH cheaper than traditional photography with the lack of overhead from film, processing, and a darkroom, and so i can pass that on to the client. for example, this last weding ended up costing the clients $568, for almost six hours of photography, and around 2,000 images. (no, that's not a typo: 2,000.)

i just finished the basic post-processing (separating wheat from chaff, red-eye reduction, selecting certain photos i think are particularly interesting, etc.) whew.

a little more for tonight, and then some sleep!

p.s. if you or someone you know is getting married, i'll travel to interesting places for no or little additional cost! (no additional cost if i can justify the travel as a fun vacation for me, and a little additional cost if it's an exceptionally expensive place to find accommodations.)

recent beer reviews!

under my (other) nom de plume, Warmstorage, i review lots of beers and brewpubs on a couple of different sites. of late, i've mostly been reviewing on beeradvocate.com. a few recent reviews:

Sierra Nevada Brewing Company (aka The Mothership), Chico, CA (reviewed : http://www.beeradvocate.com/beerfly/user_reviews/140/
Beermann's Beerwerks, Lincoln, CA: http://www.beeradvocate.com/beerfly/user_reviews/8817

(both Sierra Nevada and Beermann's Beerwerks were visited, imbibed with, and reviewed cojointly with The Good Senator .)

Sierra Nevada Bigfoot Barleywine: http://www.beeradvocate.com/beer/rate_results/140/2671/latest/0/warmstorage/
Sierra Nevada Best Bitter Ale: http://www.beeradvocate.com/beer/rate_results/140/8169/latest/0/warmstorage/
Anchor Brewing, 1997 Our Special Ale (Christmas Ale): http://www.beeradvocate.com/beer/rate_results/28/2880/latest/0/warmstorage/

homebrew!

i'm fretting quite extensively about the IPA that S and i homebrewed on Friday (he took the day off of work to brew: there's a man who has his priorities straight!)

it was the first batch i've brewed in a long time, and the first time he's ever brewed. more worrisome to me, i've always brewed with other, more experienced brewers, who were in charge of when the inevitable existential and logistical crises developed. being the lead brewer was pretty nerveracking.

good things:

• we got it all brewed, without totally destroying the kitchen in the rented home he just moved in to about two weeks ago.
  
• it's the correct general color
  
• it started with a VERY vigorous fermenting action
  
• i have yet to be made sick by it

bad things:

• i dropped the carboy (thankfully, we spent the extra $20 for a high tech, plastic carboy!) while aerating it, spilling probably a half gallon.
  
• the disinterested guy that sold us the homebrew equipment didn't bother to point out that the high tech plastic carboy needed a smaller rubber cork for the airlock, so the homebrew spent its first 24 hours of existence with ziploc bag taped over it for an airlock.
  
• we only had a 15.1 liter pot to brew in, so we were volume limited, and i didn't add enough plain water to the fermenter, so we only have about 3.5 gallons fermenting in the 5 gallon carboy.
  
• the fermenting action has dropped dramatically, leading me to worry incessantly.
  
• S's house is FUCKING COLD, so we've had to turn on the heat to keep the fermenting temperature warm enough, which makes the front living room area of his house unbearably hot. so i closed all the vents in the house outside of the room where it's fermenting.

i'm toying with re-pitching yeast tomorrow if we don't get some fermentation action.

in other notes, The Good Senator is in town, and we spent most of yesterday brewpub touring. links to reviews to be posted soon.

back to worrying about the homebrew, and reading Papazian's The Complete Joy of Homebrewing.

annualcreditreport.com

for fun, i used the new FACT Act free credit report service last night, to see what random things have popped up on my credit reporting since i last checked it, about a year and a half ago. it's a decent service, although, bizarrely, i failed the security check questions asked by Trans-Union and Equifax, and so was only able to view my Experian report.

imagine my surprise to see a collection account for an old T-Mobile bill ($46) that i already paid off once for nuisance value. i'm on hold now with the fucking new collection company, and since i can't figure out what bank i wrote the check on (it was about two years, five addresses, and several banks ago) i guess i'm going to pay it off AGAIN for nuisance value. sure makes me mad, but it makes me even angrier to have it marring my otherwise good credit.

this time i'm going to CC the letter to the president of T-Mobile and see if I can get them to confirm that it was, in fact, paid off this time.

i know these rude, curt, terse bottom feeders are really just regular people doing their shitty, barely above minimum wage jobs (and in fucking florida, at that.) i know this. . .
but fuck, can't you just give me an address to send a check to for $46.39, so i can pay this fucking thing off? why do you need to transfer me to two different people, and then call me back? why?

back in saccaminnow
back now in the house that i grew up in. it's a little odd, and a little comforting. i've been running, and riding, and walking a lot (the upside of not having our car here: J is driving it up later this week from san diego.)

while there are certainly parts of san diego that i'll miss (yes, it's pleasant to go look out over the ocean), there are so many that i won't: traffic; image-obsessed, plastic people; absurd cost of living; the right wing reactionism. it was awfully nice to walk around in december and january in shorts and short sleeves, though much of san diego's supposedly "perfect" weather is, as noted by me before, just smart (and untrue) marketing.

a series of physical and gastrointestinal ailments, and two bad colds in two weeks, have left me way off of marathon training pace, and doubting whether i'll be in good shape for a may marathon. since the travel schedule only calms somewhat in the next few months, i'm likely to reschedule training and a marathon for Utah, when i can do it right. in the meantime, the likely plan is to keep exercising and stay in good shape, so that i'm not starting over when i do begin active marathon training again.

plans on the middle burners include a bike tour (with J) down the Oregon and northern California coast, seeing how many brewpubs and wineries (if not vineyards) we can hit without going very far out of our way. i just bought the brand new edition of Bicycling the Pacific Coast by Vicky Spring and Tom Kirkendall, the acknowledged bible of this bike route, which i also used when i rode from Saccaminnow to San Diego in spring 1995.

that ride was on the cheap, and totally self-supported: i was loaded down with a sleeping bag, several changes of clothes, etc. this time around, our older and creakier bodies are requesting that we do it much less on the cheap. while we're certainly not planning a true "credit card tour", we are going to stay mostly/entirely in places with roofs, and not carry pounds and pounds of food, and find a laundromat a couple of times along the way, so that we can mostly carry extra socks and underwear, and not multiple changes of clothing. i expect it to be a hell of a lot more pleasant ride, and probably every bit as scenic.

now i'm going to go strip, sand, and stain five pieces of furniture. it's nice to have a garage and driveway to work with again!

back in saccaminnow

back now in the house that i grew up in. it's a little odd, and a little comforting. i've been running, and riding, and walking a lot (the upside of not having our car here: J is driving it up later this week from san diego.)

while there are certainly parts of san diego that i'll miss (yes, it's pleasant to go look out over the ocean), there are so many that i won't: traffic; image-obsessed, plastic people; absurd cost of living; the right wing reactionism. it was awfully nice to walk around in december and january in shorts and short sleeves, though much of san diego's supposedly "perfect" weather is, as noted by me before, just smart (and untrue) marketing.

a series of physical and gastrointestinal ailments, and two bad colds in two weeks, have left me way off of marathon training pace, and doubting whether i'll be in good shape for a may marathon. since the travel schedule only calms somewhat in the next few months, i'm likely to reschedule training and a marathon for Utah, when i can do it right. in the meantime, the likely plan is to keep exercising and stay in good shape, so that i'm not starting over when i do begin active marathon training again.

plans on the middle burners include a bike tour (with J) down the Oregon and northern California coast, seeing how many brewpubs and wineries (if not vineyards) we can hit without going very far out of our way. i just bought the brand new edition of Bicycling the Pacific Coast by Vicky Spring and Tom Kirkendall, the acknowledged bible of this bike route, which i also used when i rode from Saccaminnow to San Diego in spring 1995.

that ride was on the cheap, and totally self-supported: i was loaded down with a sleeping bag, several changes of clothes, etc. this time around, our older and creakier bodies are requesting that we do it much less on the cheap. while we're certainly not planning a true "credit card tour", we are going to stay mostly/entirely in places with roofs, and not carry pounds and pounds of food, and find a laundromat a couple of times along the way, so that we can mostly carry extra socks and underwear, and not multiple changes of clothing. i expect it to be a hell of a lot more pleasant ride, and probably every bit as scenic.

now i'm going to go strip, sand, and stain five pieces of furniture. it's nice to have a garage and driveway to work with again!