Yeah, it's Atlanta: less than a month after the gnashing of teeth and rending of winter garments when the temperatures dropped into the single digits and we got two inches of snow in one day (OH, THE HORROR!) we're starting thunderstorm season here in the A-T-L:
"
TODAY
CHANCE OF SHOWERS AND THUNDERSTORMS IN THE MORNING
THEN SHOWERS AND THUNDERSTORMS IN THE AFTERNOON. WINDY. SOME THUNDERSTORMS MAY BE SEVERE WITH DAMAGING WINDS IN THE AFTERNOON. HIGHS IN THE MID 70S. SOUTHWEST WINDS 15 TO 25 MPH. CHANCE OF RAIN NEAR 100 PERCENT.
"
Sounds like a good day to blog, yeah?
(Oh, and BTW, the benevolent dictatorship here at DANGR World HQ has heard the cries of the people, and we will allow Free and Fair Elections(tm) in November. No, to hell with that, we'll fight to the death. But we'll throw a bone, since the cries of the assembled masses have been heard, even all the way up here in the corner office: triple sec!)
Showing posts with label alcohol. Show all posts
Showing posts with label alcohol. Show all posts
Monday, February 28, 2011
Thursday, February 24, 2011
Sangria porn?
A few of you know this, but for those who don't: I make a pretty mean sangria.
Raw materials = not cheap. The fruit alone cost around $20.
After much slicing and peeling.
And with the liquid love added.
The only thing you're not seeing is my super secret ninja ingredient. Whoever guesses it correctly gets me to make them a bigass pitcher of delicious sangria the next time I see you, so light that Comments section up, people!
Raw materials = not cheap. The fruit alone cost around $20.
After much slicing and peeling.
And with the liquid love added.The only thing you're not seeing is my super secret ninja ingredient. Whoever guesses it correctly gets me to make them a bigass pitcher of delicious sangria the next time I see you, so light that Comments section up, people!
Saturday, September 26, 2009
Honestly truly overheard on Delta 844
Passenger in 1D (first class) is lucky enough to be the only person to get a pre-flight drink, as the pilots were apparently trying to hustle us out of PIT to avoid ground delays in ATL. Woman in her 50s or 60s, somewhere between obese and morbidly obese, orders “a vodka with just a tiny splash of orange juice.” It's almost 6 in the evening, so nothing too surprising so far.
Woman gets her drink, and begins slurping it down like she just walked out of the Sonoran desert and missed the drive-through liquor stores in the Arizona stretch.
Somehow the conversation with the (amazingly friendly) flight attendant turns to this (paraphrased, but pretty darn close):
Flight attendant: You should watch it, because alcohol affects you double in the air than it does on the ground.
Editor's note:(A marginally dubious claim, which I'm unable to find primary evidence to support or disprove. The best indications are that the added intensity of alcohol consumption in flight is really rooted in dehydration, so you mostly need to be sure to consume a lot of water. A more profound impact than on the ground? Maybe. Double? There is zero evidence i can find for this. But I digress.)
Woman: Really? I have never, ever heard that, and I fly all the time.
Flight attendant: Oh yeah, absolutely, no question about it.
Woman Who Flies All The Time:Wow -- I have never heard that. I'll be fine, though: I can sit here and drink a fifth of vodka straight and not even feel it.
Flight attendant: Oh wow, well, you won't be getting that tonight. (It's an hour and a half flight, incidentally.)
Fifth of Vodka Woman: Oh yeah, I can drink anyone, and I mean anyone, under the table in about three minutes! Any man, any woman!
(inaudible conversation, brief pause as the flight attendant goes and does some other stuff)
Woman Who Can Drink Any Man, Any Woman, Under The Table In About Three Minutes: Say, do you sell these little bottles on board?
Flight attendant: No, sorry, we don't.
Woman Who Wants To Give The Idea Of Buy On Board A Whole New Meaning:That's too bad, 'cause I've been taking care of my mother who is 91 all week, and she has a whole line of them on her shelf, and I thought I'd take her a couple. (That she is apparently heading the wrong direction for such a gift is part of the nature of the Folk Process, with apologies to Dry Branch Fire Squad.)
Flight attendant: Well, you know you can buy them at any liquor store?
Woman Who Wants To Give Her 91 Year Old Mother A Couple Shooter Bottles of Cheap Vodka As A Gift To Add To Mother's Collection: Really? I never heard of that! Never saw them!
Flight attendant: Sure, every liquor store sells them.
Woman Who Can Drink A Fifth of Vodka In About Three Minutes And Not Even Feel It And Can Drink Any Man Or Woman Under The Table In About Three Minutes But Doesn't Know Liquor Stores Sell Small Shooter Bottles Of Cheap Vodka: Well, I'll just have to look for that!
A few minutes go by, we continue the pre-flight process, and next thing I hear is the flight attendant leaning in close and telling the woman kindly, but firmly and repeatedly, that she needs to behave herself. Gosh, can't imagine why.
Woman gets her drink, and begins slurping it down like she just walked out of the Sonoran desert and missed the drive-through liquor stores in the Arizona stretch.
Somehow the conversation with the (amazingly friendly) flight attendant turns to this (paraphrased, but pretty darn close):
Flight attendant: You should watch it, because alcohol affects you double in the air than it does on the ground.
Editor's note:(A marginally dubious claim, which I'm unable to find primary evidence to support or disprove. The best indications are that the added intensity of alcohol consumption in flight is really rooted in dehydration, so you mostly need to be sure to consume a lot of water. A more profound impact than on the ground? Maybe. Double? There is zero evidence i can find for this. But I digress.)
Woman: Really? I have never, ever heard that, and I fly all the time.
Flight attendant: Oh yeah, absolutely, no question about it.
Woman Who Flies All The Time:Wow -- I have never heard that. I'll be fine, though: I can sit here and drink a fifth of vodka straight and not even feel it.
Flight attendant: Oh wow, well, you won't be getting that tonight. (It's an hour and a half flight, incidentally.)
Fifth of Vodka Woman: Oh yeah, I can drink anyone, and I mean anyone, under the table in about three minutes! Any man, any woman!
(inaudible conversation, brief pause as the flight attendant goes and does some other stuff)
Woman Who Can Drink Any Man, Any Woman, Under The Table In About Three Minutes: Say, do you sell these little bottles on board?
Flight attendant: No, sorry, we don't.
Woman Who Wants To Give The Idea Of Buy On Board A Whole New Meaning:That's too bad, 'cause I've been taking care of my mother who is 91 all week, and she has a whole line of them on her shelf, and I thought I'd take her a couple. (That she is apparently heading the wrong direction for such a gift is part of the nature of the Folk Process, with apologies to Dry Branch Fire Squad.)
Flight attendant: Well, you know you can buy them at any liquor store?
Woman Who Wants To Give Her 91 Year Old Mother A Couple Shooter Bottles of Cheap Vodka As A Gift To Add To Mother's Collection: Really? I never heard of that! Never saw them!
Flight attendant: Sure, every liquor store sells them.
Woman Who Can Drink A Fifth of Vodka In About Three Minutes And Not Even Feel It And Can Drink Any Man Or Woman Under The Table In About Three Minutes But Doesn't Know Liquor Stores Sell Small Shooter Bottles Of Cheap Vodka: Well, I'll just have to look for that!
A few minutes go by, we continue the pre-flight process, and next thing I hear is the flight attendant leaning in close and telling the woman kindly, but firmly and repeatedly, that she needs to behave herself. Gosh, can't imagine why.
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